Zip.
Nil.
Nada.
Nothing.
Nothing has developed. At least from my point of view. I don't know what I was even expecting. It hurts to wait and I don't want to wait but I am. I'm desperately clinging onto that sliver of hope that maybe, just maybe, we could be something. But that isn't happening any time soon, nor am I even sure that it's ever going to happen. I don't even know if what I actually feel is the same as what I think I'm feeling.
I don't watch the show "Awkward" but my friend was telling me about what happened in this one episode. Basically, the main character is caught between two guys and she has no idea who to choose. So in this episode, she was imagining scenarios of what could have happened if things were different. One of those possibilities involved her and one of the guys making love and ending up with her hopelessly in love with him while he couldn't reciprocate the feelings. In that scenario, she realized that maybe she had only thought she was in love with him because of what happened.
That could be happening to me too. You know how they say that things like that mess with girls more than guys because we're more emotional. I think that could be true because I'm sitting here feeling so many things at the same time and I highly doubt it's the same with him.
I do hate being a girl sometimes. Now is one of those times.
This particular entry in Thought Catalog captures a lot of my feelings perfectly. I'll leave the link here and end this post because I really need to sleep. Enjoy: http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/133421/
I wish I could read his mind,
Louise
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